Saturday, June 07, 2014

Day one- My personal journey through Depression

Life is hard.  We all know that. If life was all roses and rainbows we would not be so different.

But life has thorns and thunderstorms.

Some of us can weather each storm and stay away from the thorns and live a "normal" life.  Then there are those of us that no matter how hard we try,  the thorns dig deeper into our souls and the storms are never ending.

When we reach the point of not being able to handle things,  the medical term is depression.  Some people are able to handle thier depression with lifestyle changes,  such as a change in diet and adding exercise.  Then there are people like me who just cannot fix themselves.

In 2008 I was diagnosed with severe post partum depression that had gone undiagnosed since '97/'98 when my first born was still a baby.  The diagnosis happened in the middle of my pregnancy (6.5mo) with my third child. There were so many things happening in my life that I couldn't handle.

I was put on Zoloft,  which was deemed the safest medication to use during pregnancy at that time.  I started out with 50mgs, then by the time he was born I was up to 150mgs. I stayed on the medication until my insurance coverage stopped,  which was 6 mo after he was born. So I want on it for a whole year. More like 8 months.  Then my therapist agreed I didn't need it anymore. So I stopped after lowering the dose  and finishing the bottle I had.

Only,  things got worse in my life and I ended up back in the vicious circle of depression.  It took me another 4 years, and finally a good insurance,  to admit I couldn't deal with life and I wasn't myself.
So three weeks ago my current doctor put me back on Zoloft, 50mgs. Life is a little better to deal with.  However the side effects I experienced with Zoloft were already wearing me thin and were almost outweighing the positive effects.  So yesterday my doctor said I could try something different if I wanted to. I said yes. Anything to get away from the awful side effects of excessive sweating.

So this morning was my first dose of Effexor. We shall see in two weeks how I'm doing with this new medication.